2007 Reflections

After a few weeks off I return to poker in 2008 with an optimistic mindset and lofty goals.

I ended off the year with a nice December, finishing the year up about 20% more than I finished 2006 with. Now there are 2 ways I’ve looked at this. One being the obvious – a 20% increase in pay no matter what you do is always welcomed. But I also think of what could have been. I hate looking back and regretting anything I do, but my lazy lifestyle and mindset consistently puts me in spots in life where I look back with deep regret.

2007 was a fine year. I made the move from full time sit&go player to full time cash game player. I made this move because I felt the edge one has or is able to have in sit&go’s is capped by the inherent limitations of the chip structures in them. Once you get past the first few levels, no amount of “thinking” will really separate you from your average donkament player. And since basic donkament strategy is so easily learned, the opponent skill level ever increases while yours is forced to stagnate. So I moved to cash games full time - despite having admittedly little solid cash game experience. Regardless, I found success early and never really had any big gaping leaks. The money was about the same as SNG’s, but the limitations were gone. I fell in love with poker all over again. I was able to think analytically about hands and out think opponents. Winning in this way is much more satisfying then memorizing a bunch of push/fold charts and mindlessly pressing buttons.

Early in the year I had grand visions. I saw the potential of unlimited growth in my game and bankroll. However it would be my innate risk aversion and laziness that would be my ultimate limitation. Each month I posted solid winning numbers and each month I just stayed at the same level, content on stagnating. Now that isn’t to say that I didn’t improve my game throughout the year – I did greatly – but I certainly didn’t challenge myself to achieve my full potential - story of my life. This takes us to today, the beginning of 2008. I did manage to move up one level throughout the year, but it still is a disappointment for me. I mean, I’ve never even really failed at poker at any level. Shouldn’t that tell me something? Sure I’ve had bad days, weeks and months, but I’ve always bounced back. My stats are among the best of all online players at my level of play, yet I remain playing them, not moving up.

I suppose this is just another example of poker being a microcosm of my life. I hate risk. I love a sure thing. And since I know I can beat 200NL for a decent amount of cash each month with absolutely zero risk I figure that it is probably the most optimal outcome. But it obviously isn’t. And herein lies the limitations of most human beings (myself included). Taking risks in life are always easy to see and talk about, but the executions of risks are what hold most people back. We know these risks are what can lead us to the life we want, yet 99% of people hold back and go the safe route. The interesting thing I’ve always thought about regarding risks is that you can almost always reset back to your default, easy path if the risk fails. I mean if one day I decided to take a shot and play 2000NL, and I failed, clearly I can go back to 200NL and succeed with my default life. But if that shot works and I never look back, well damn, that’s a sweet ass life.

So to anyone who is still with me, make 2008 the year of risks. I know I will be playing a lot more, and being a lot more aggressive with my decisions.

Let’s see how this all works out next January.